curdled

Tell me again
As I sit
with my knees pulled up to my chest
with my chin on my crossed arms
and my eyes on my unpainted toes
As the stars move across
from one end of the horizon to the other
As the smoke drifts lazily
curling up from the tip of your lit cigarette
and from your pursed lips
As stray breezes
tug at washed clothes hung out to dry
nose at the newly shorn head and the baby curls
slide across my back and make me shiver
As extremities freeze in the cold dry air

As I tell a stranger things never put in words before
and as someone I know not seems to know me
anyway

Tell me again
What am I doing here, exactly?