strange days

I stay awake and check my spaces,
calculate the time in other places
Online at two, just to say hi;
And then, within ten minutes, goodbye
Reassess new relationships
Rate and order online friendships
Sit in silence under sunsets and dream
Take my sister out for ice-cream
Drive in peak traffic with a potpourri
of sixteen-year-olds in the car with me;
Sprawl in dingy corners of strange spots
watch relatives down tequila shots.

Play lonesome music and sing along
(if any of you ever needs a song -
music to cry to, come to me quick!
my collection's wistful, eclectic)
Moan at all the crushing misery
of not being as good as I wish to be
Things that cause me acute distress
which will not let me be unless
I manage to fix my poor design
But in the end I have to resign
myself to failure and agree
that this architecture's not for me.

So then I come to blogger again
when I'm in pain, and then again when
everything just gets too overwhelming
and the only way to fix it is the writing
Voilà, and therapy newfound that
seems to work rather better than cat.